I am registered as non-partisan. I belong to no political party. I think it is no secret that I tend to idealize left, but I hope to do so in a way tempered with more reason than I can rightfully afford myself as party to any particularly competing or politicking group. That said, I tried, and to a large degree succeeded in, making my views on the campaigns take shape bereft of racial implication. For a good deal of the last year, the notion never entered my mind. I never hoped Obama would win because of his skin color, nor did I truly fear that he would lose for the same. I never presumed McCain kept company with racists nor did I close my ears to his views whilst secretly rooting for some visual underdog. I heartily focused issue to issue, debate to debate, character to character as McCain and Obama squared off. It was nice. It was nice to finally have a Presidential race that remained positive for a good deal of the run. It was nice to see clear differences in our candidates and issues that were genuine concerns taking up most of our air time. It was nice not having a Bush or a Clinton on the ballot for the first time in 28 years. The choice felt free again.
Regardless, however, of how hard I may have tried, succeeded, or even perhaps failed in the end at ignoring race as a potential political shapeshifter, I could neither before the election nor now deny the historical significance of what has become an unprecedented achievement. Skin color is not a reason to vote for a president. Skin color is not a reason to vote against one. Once elected, though, it is a key element thereafter to the immensity of the historical feat. Race, after this election fact, but before the world leader litmus test, is at once a symbol, an achievement, a proof, an indicator, a wonder, a surprise, a passion, a leveling, a coming-together, a change, and a statement. While just any old member of any old race would not have done, Obama was the right candidate for his party. Race did not make him the right candidate, but being the right candidate allowed for a linchpin moment in America wherein his race must be part of that moment’s description.
So, basking in America’s ability to come together and to care about voting again, I would like to take this moment to talk about that which cannot be ignored today…race. Not racism. Race!
Whether you picked it up on the media or languished over the idea in conversation with your loved ones, there was always this question throughout the campaign season as to whether or not America was “ready” for a “black President.” Both candidates were smart in steering clear of the question. Forget the wisdom in avoiding the query because it is an inflammatory question with several inflammatory answers and explanations. They were smart to do so because the question has no heft. It cannot be answered. It is completely made-up. There is no factual or empirical criterion upon which to measure collective mental and emotional readiness for someone else to do his job. What means we are ready? What flawless indicator could a person possibly point to as an answer one way or the other? What could you have in your pocket today that you didn’t have yesterday that could identify you as prepared for a “black President?” Essentially, it’s just another way of saying, “Do you think America is still filled with a majority of racist swine?” By recognizing the question as immaterial and avoiding those inflammatory possibilities as a fringe benefit, look what happened. It opened the door to talk about the subject rationally.
When “reverse” racist allegations and evidences were piling up against the Reverend Jeremiah Wright, Obama walked through that door, calmly, intellectually, and talked about race. Not racism, race. In fact, presumably running the risk of jeopardizing his entire campaign, he spoke on the topic so truly, openly and precisely, his words may well prove one of the greatest speeches on race our national history will ever know. At the very same time that regular Americans were unconsciously contemplating whether or not they were “ready” for a “black President,” as prompted by media and naysayers, literature and maybe even inner demons, Obama walked out and shared with them a whole bunch of details about race in America that they already knew. He reinforced their belief in their own goodness. He ingratiated himself to like minds without pandering. “Hey, I am actually thinking what you all are thinking.” He just had the bravery to say it and the clout to influence folks to listen. He didn’t have to answer the question of whether or not America was “ready” for a “black president,” because a hard-worked win would answer that question for us.
Inspired, I too wish tackle new ground. I would like to try to theoretically answer the unanswerable question. What did Americans have in their pockets on this Election Day, whether they voted Democrat or Republican, that they did not have a few years ago? What allegedly made them “ready?”
The obvious responses go without saying. America had the right candidates. McCain supporters never had to worry about that great man, their representative, showing up in a KKK photo or any serious gaff reel in black face. Obama supporters never had to worry about a Tawana Brawley-like association or a pubic hair on a Coke can popping out of the man’s closet. In primaries and campaigns past, one side or the other winding up with the “wrong” candidate, we always spent inordinate time pointing out the multiple flaws in that person’s character. It left little room to probe the minds, beliefs, and issues for which the loud-mouthed finger-pointers stood. As a result, we’re going to elect the occasional out-of-touch rep. or racist or bigot or racially motivated numb-skull, almost by accident. Choosing the right candidates is a vote to talk about what is actually going on, everything that is going on.
Also an obvious pocket pal indicating why we were “ready” was a lame duck administration effecting the campaign environment. Perhaps Chris Rock put it best in his HBO special, Kill The Messenger when he said, “Bush made it hard for a white man to run for President.” More accurately put, it might be that Bush was viewed as having bottomed out so far below even the minimum expectations of a Presidency, that by comparison, any issues the general populous might have had with race seemed small and petty. Like W. or hate him, the particular class of decisions he and his cronies have made over eight years in office is unlike any in our lifetime. The list is long, yes, but each item on that list has additionally a blockbuster ramification. You may not blame W. for all of them, but even when you cut the list down there always seems another two pages of bad. Unbelievable! All a person of any race should have had to do to get in the primaries door was to point at W. and say, “I disagree.” Obama, skin color and proud multiple heritages aside, maybe said it most eloquently when he phrased our disillusionment as, “Enough!”
Outside of plain sight, at least theoretically, I think we have fuller pockets than just what’s offered above. What else made us “ready?” Mindset. Mindset is key. If the fake question, “Is America ready for a ‘black President?’” really asks, “Is America filled with racist swine?” and if the election outcome is overwhelming proof that America is not; what changed, motivated, or brought the balanced mindset to the surface? What made these existing, shared ideas of equality an election reality? Well, let’s look at the last several years of pop culture. What’s been out there in the public mainstream? TV, movies, fictions many.
You’ve had a show called The West Wing, an hour-long weekly drama centered on a fictional, Democratic President and the behind-the-scenes running of The White House. Those who followed the program got very into the high-energy, challenged ethic, quick-to-quip go-go-go pace of the fictional administration. Perhaps Obama’s administration cannot achieve that precise and speedy White House repartee, but we all knew for certain when watching the show, Bush’s White House definitely did not, could not. The show was what we wanted in direct contrast to what we had. That is a seed of change.
We had a program called American Idol, a show that let the country vote and vote and vote as often as they liked, assured they were making a difference each week, each season in selecting a winner. Each season that they did so, new groups of competitors showed up on our screens and in our living rooms, real people, not sitcom characters. These people were African-American and European-American, Asian, Australian, you name it. The voting results not only showed great acceptance among all those groups, not only showed that the show was about singing talent above skin color, but it also gave us weekly results that reinforced the general absence of race motivators in those tabulations. Our opinions came to the surface and were shared with the nation, weekly. Who knew, until they were televised, that there were so many of us who could look beyond race and vote on talent?
Is there any other epoch you can think of that could see droves of Americans crying out to declare English our national language at the same time our toddlers are watching Dora the Explorer, Go Diego Go, Ni Hao, Kai-lan, and other language-boosting, educational cartoons in good parental faith. This is a brilliant dichotomy that allows both notions to exist simultaneously. It is, in and of itself, a plurality and one that, like those above, is in our minds and at our dinner tables each day. We support our children learning languages early and we support the idea of nationalizing a language pick for commonality’s sake. ESL classes crop up everywhere for those who want to learn English at the same time every noisy Fisher-Price toy you buy speaks English and Spanish and German and French. Agree or disagree, there is enough mirth in the two practices to conclude that there is plenty of room in this country for both acceptance and function across heritage lines and language barriers.
The recent list of mainstream fiction that jumps over a few real life prejudices and complications to otherwise familiarize our mind’s eye with new possibilities seems endless. Chris Rock made an excellent comedy feature called Head of State in which he ran for President and won. Geena Davis starred on an ABC TV series called Commander-In-Chief in which she played the President. Glenn Close, as Vice-President in the film Air Force One, has to stand up to a War Room full of brilliant men to run the nation while her President, Harrison Ford, might be dead or incapacitated. Morgan Freeman’s career alone, in part, consisted of an escalating string of films wherein the characters he played grew more and more ranked. In Glory he was a Union Sergeant. In Outbreak, he was a Brigadier General. In Deep Impact he was President of the United States. In Bruce Almighty, he was God. Notice, all consummate characters that were highly believable in the settings given despite the actor's skin color. The 2005 Academy Award winner for best picture was a film called Crash, one that employed a very diverse cast and a Six Degrees of Separation feel to describe the state of conscious and unconscious prejudice in modern America. Russell Simmons’ fantastic recurring HBO series Def Comedy Jam and Def Poetry Jam significantly mainstreamed large chunks of hip-hop culture and art into hometown American culture while celebrating diversity themselves. Sex and the City popularized cosmopolitan women. Big Love examined polygamy. Oz captured America’s attention looking at violence and racism in the nation’s underbelly, its prisons. The Matrix trilogy gave all human races a common enemy, galvanizing them in faith of a savoir prophecy. The Sopranos showed what American society looked like through the eyes of organized crime, encompassing the same tribulations as mainstream America, but always walking that fine line between proud, Italian-American heritage and the unacceptable violence within “the family.” South Park, an adult, comedy cartoon series, includes a single black character named Token, as if to point out and ostracize our past practices of including “token” black characters by underscoring just how ridiculous that was compared to our modern sensibilities. The House of Sand and Fog is a wonderful cultural character study which won a great deal of Academy nominations and awards. A comic strip, The Boondocks, which centralizes around a young African-American of pseudo-militant mind is the first of its kind and subject matter to win widespread appeal and acclaim. Will & Grace allowed us to laugh in a gay lawyer’s living room. ER took us to a place where everybody has common concerns and the human interest never stops. By the way, they also took us to the deep, rural, American south, to Croatia, to Africa, and beyond. Frasier caricatured elitists and intelligentsia. On a given DVR night, we might have had to decide between watching Queer as Folk or Queer Eye For The Straight Guy. Real life American judges of every heritage started to land show after show on daytime TV. True Blood, the books from which it is taken and the cable TV series that carries the title, lets us examine real life prejudices through fictional vampires. We are suddenly no longer afraid to look back and pen a period piece with a real life bias component or even a present day piece with our own societal drawbacks. In what other generation could you get such a plethora of serious film pieces grown from bias and struggle like Introducing Dorothy Dandridge, The Last Samurai, Lackawanna Blues, Freedom Writers, Luminarias, Stand and Deliver, The Crucible, The Green Mile, Gangs of New York, Moulin Rouge, Spanglish, A Time To Kill, Medal of Honor, Ray, The Passion of The Christ, American History X, Dreamgirls, Amistad, Erin Brockovich, Men of Honor, and A Bronx Tale?
Sure previous generations had a play or two, a movie here or there, a mini-series that caught the public attention. Race, bias, injustice; they have always been concerns and therefore have always made great drama, even comedy. But never before was the backdrop of bias and the list of ways in which to understand it and deal with it so centralized in the mainstream public eye. People could most recently afford and did purchase thousands of TV channels instead of accepting one of three network choices on the public airwaves. People now had computer access at home, in school, at work, in transit, at the coffee house, or while camping. People could generate enough disposable cash to see every summer blockbuster and every Academy Award nominee at the multiplex before reviews even hit the papers. Just one generation ago you had a people, a fair-minded crop living amidst an activist youth culture, that sincerely went from watching propaganda films and silver screen classics to hailing Roots as the best miniseries ever. That generation made the transition from watching Jimmy Stewart in what seemed like every film to seeing their kids watch What’s Happening and Diff’rent Strokes in constant, back to back reruns. For them, that was an enormous change. For us, it’s the lesser artful beginnings to the theme of our entire pop culture lives. Inclusiveness and acceptance within our ranks and masses meant the arts would reach out and tell us more, replicate these driven ideas of equality and explore them with the audience in more interesting detail. We went from three choices of network, in short order, to multimedia choices numbering in the thousands. We went from thinking that sitcoms casting black actors were for a target audience only, to shows that everybody loved, like The Cosby Show, to a veritable effluvium of never-ending entertainment, education, and information far too vast to fill with only one norm. A strong majority of entertainment never deals directly with bias or even illustrates it as a backdrop. Most shows are simply about other things. Having such a monster volume of entertainment choices, however, naturally increases the “lesser” number of shows that will deal with that distinct notion in all kinds of ways. Does having all this fiction solve racial tensions? No. Does having them around even alleviate, in any direct way, the problems of the world? Absolutely not. What these entertainments do is allow us to talk about it. It might be hard for any two people to talk about a difference in perception of skin color, say, but they can both talk about what happened on Oprah yesterday. It might be uneasy or even heated to discuss racism around the water cooler, but everybody has an opinion on Danny Glover’s performance or Margaret Cho’s jokes or Ellen coming out. Fiction is an ice breaker to the future.
Yes, fiction helps, but it cannot win out alone. During much of the same time all these stories, laughs, and “what-if” cultural exchanges were taking place, the world of fact rolled on. DNA tests started to get precise enough to determine the ancestral heritage in a person’s biological build. It goes without saying this would mean something positive to groups who’d had origins robbed from them. Charles Barkley toured the nation talking about how he felt that not only African-Americans were undervalued by the U.S. government, but Latinos and poor whites as well. He was obviously not the first one to speak on this, nor to extend the implications across color lines, nor even the most succinct, but he was hero enough to sports fans to reach a great many new minds. Bill Maher got fired from his own show on ABC, one having been brought over from HBO called Politically Incorrect, for saying something considered politically incorrect post 9/11. The Dixie Chicks similarly lost a huge percentage of their fan base when country music stations boycotted their albums after one member of the group publicly expressed a feeling that didn’t jibe with the pro-Bush sentiment of the day. A black man, chained and dragged to death by a white man in Jasper, Texas gave rise to a court battle that saw the first white man ever to be put on death row for the murder of a black man in that state (with the exception of an 1854 crime where one slave owner killed another’s slave in what was essentially tried as a property crime). Shock jocks were getting fined and fired nation-wide as people once afraid to call them on remarks that were sure to incite division decided to speak up. Denzel Washington and Halle Berry won Academy Awards in the same season in their lead actor categories, the first time both those slots had gone to African-Americans in the history of the awards. They accepted on the same night that Sidney Poitier received the Lifetime Achievement Award. The Olympic Games broke out from their regular four year pattern to alternate summer and winter games every two years. With NBC landing the rights to carry the broadcast, not only were we treated to views of peoples and talent around the world twice as often, but under the incomparable sports-casting umbrella that is Bob Costas’ genius, the proper time was taken to cover all major names and teams. Our country found itself no longer rooting only for the U.S.A., but for global underdogs and sometimes even the home team in many a nation. Condoleezza Rice became U.S. Secretary of State. SNL had two female co-anchors to its Weekend Update segment for the first time in the show’s history. Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, following in the 1960’s footsteps of Star Trek the original series which had an episode that would showcase the very first interracial kiss on network television, in the 90’s offered up the very first, dramatic same-sex kiss on network television. George W. Bush promised supporters that if they elected him to a second term, he would seek a constitutional amendment defining marriage as a sacred union between a man and a woman, thereby disallowing same-sex marriages on the federal level and failing to extend marital rights to the LGBT community under the law. Hurricane Katrina lead to the levies in New Orleans collapsing, waters flooding the entire city, literally uncountable deaths, and an embarrassing American spotlight on the great divide between middle class and poor. Kayne West went “off-book” on his testimonial during the live Katrina relief effort and alleged, among other claims, that the President of the United States hated black people. The West Wing TV series finished off with a whole season geared around two new campaigners for the U.S. Presidency (Alan Alda and Jimmy Smits), not only examining the angles of a Latino man’s run for that top seat, but also making television history by broadcasting a live, unscripted debate between the two characters as if they were real candidates. A change in Popes saw Pope Benedict XVI announce that secularism was the Roman Catholic Church’s true enemy. Reality TV took a foothold in the public eye, many incarnations of which created competitions with contestants purposely chosen for conflicting or even racist views. Janet Jackson’s one breast was a topic of conversation for over a year after it, pasty and all, was removed from her clothing during a Super Bowl half-time performance. In New York City, under Mayor Rudy Giuliani, a total of 14 UNARMED black men were shot by police officers, many of them killed, including an immigrant whose name became synonymous with this string of unpunished wrongful deaths, Amadou Diallo. Bruce Springsteen concerts were boycotted by police and he was protested at police rallies after writing a song about Diallo that included the victim’s name.
While fiction certainly asked us “what if;” facts, good or bad, structured the dinner table conversations in a way where folks would talk about, “How could we get there from here? Given the perils of today, how could we make that fantasy a reality?” The frequency of both kept this intercourse and these thoughts going. There was always something to discuss, a new hallmark from which to move on, to grow. While this has been true for all previous generations, what differs in ours is the infinitive number of conduits for factual and fictional information to pour into our wisdom. In 1963 you could just turn the TV off, put the paper down. Today entertainment and informational sources are constant reminders, almost in-your-face calls to expand thinking, to readjust on the fly, to speed the social evolution along. They are in your pocket, on your laptop, on a cell phone, bolted to the wall on a large screen TV with a billion satellite channels. They are on XM radio, cable, FIOS, air waves, DVD, Blu-ray, iPods, Sidekicks, RSS feeds, websites, blogs, vlogs, books, eBooks, periodicals, mass mailers, email, presentations, Podcasts, electronic billboards, spam, on screens in taxi cabs and elevators, and even phoned in with a robot. If you’d always felt there was so much more to know, superlative access to information was always the way to get there. The more one knows, the broader his or her thinking can become. That speaks to mindset. It prepares you. It makes you ready for anything.
President-Elect Barack Obama is not a phenomenon. There are plenty of people fluent in plenty of languages backed with plenty of ideas and with skin colors as varied as the 64-bit setting on a PC in our America. A staggering number of those people exhibit all the fine attributes Obama seems to exude. They are gentlemen and gentlewomen, proud parents, decent politicians, educated, great speakers, authors, hard-workers, exceptional fund raisers, deep thinkers, good joke tellers, and people all with hopes and dreams. Again, he is no anomaly. The anomaly is a civilization that just 8 to 16 years ago was collectively stupid enough to try to answer an unanswerable question with a very loud and determined “No, we are not ready for a black President!” That very civilization instead came to the conclusion, in less time than it takes for a bond to mature, that it is simply okay for these two guys to run. Suddenly, very suddenly, either of them was eligible to win and we didn’t really have a problem with that. Obama’s win may be astounding history, but that history is our prize.
Friday, November 7, 2008
Ready Or Not: Obama Wins
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Pockets
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9:52 AM
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Labels: 2008 Election, Art, black president, Obama, race, society
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
Those Wacky Terrorists!
Al-Qaida-linked Web site backs McCain as president
WASHINGTON (AP) — Al-Qaida supporters suggested in a Web site message this week they would welcome a pre-election terror attack on the U.S. as a way to usher in a McCain presidency.I'm sure there are Americans who would welcome that. Maybe not the assholes rooting for Gustav, but some.
The message, posted Monday on the password-protected al-Hesbah Web site, said if al-Qaida wants to exhaust the United States militarily and economically, "impetuous" Republican presidential candidate Sen. John McCain is the better choice because he is more likely to continue the wars in Iraq and Afghanistan.This is terrible! How lucky are we to have such brave and selfless agents at the CIA, the FBI and the NSA to alert us to this upcoming danger!
Wait, what? They aren't involved?
Apparently, SITE Intelligence Group is in the business of giving sensitive intelligence to those willing to pay. And all the time, not just when there's such an "important" election at stake. Still, I understand that when the threat of a possibly imminent terrorist attack is intercepted, the American people need to know immediately that it will be John McCain's fault!
Oh wait...
The message is credited to a frequent and apparently respected contributor named Muhammad Haafid. However, Haafid is not believed to have a direct affiliation with al-Qaida plans or knowledge of its operations, according to SITE.OMG! You guys! You almost had me, you betcha!
What a bunch of fucking idiots.
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Labels: 2008 Election, Afghanistan, idiots, Iraq, McCain, Terrorism, You have got to be fucking kidding me
Tuesday, September 30, 2008
If I Admit…A Search For Meaningful Ground
If I admit that McCain’s time in the military better suits him to be Commander-In-Chief, will you admit that time spent in an enemy prison camp probably doesn’t give him the best mindset for setting foreign policy?
If I admit that there is a tiny, little part of me that wishes to wrongly ignore all the issues and vote for Obama simply because he’s “the black guy,” will you admit that not voting for him based upon the same reason is at least equally as wrong?
If I admit that despite my vast education, the current economic crisis seems too complex for me and perhaps for most to understand, will you admit that you must comparatively know even less about the infinitely broader subject matter of God, afterlife, and metaphysics?
If I admit that I see no short-term end in sight to the nearly 50/50 electoral schism between red states and blue states, will you admit that the closest we might get to our own moderate or centrist views in The White House is a Republican for eight years followed by a Democrat for eight years, and so on?
If I admit that Sarah Palin has to have exhibited some intelligence to rise to the position of Governor, will you admit that her stance as a traditional, small government Republican simply means she does less in government?
If I admit that, no matter what he says, Obama as President coupled with a strongly Democratic U.S. Congress is going to cost you way, way, way more money in the long run, will you admit that means more money in programs and less in rich pockets?
If I admit that, based on the Reagan-esque standard, “Are you better off now than you were four years ago?” our answer in 1983 should have been a unanimous YES, will you admit that our answer to the same question in 2001, 2002, 2003, 2004, 2005, 2006, and 2007 should have been a resounding NO?
If I admit that there’s a large part of me that is simply too lazy to take personal action against global climate change, will you admit that I’m part of the problem, thereby acknowledging the problem?
If I admit that evolution could be a subset of creation, will you admit it’s the only subset based upon empirical data, and therefore the only subset teachable in an evidentiary manner?
If I admit that I’d be willing to acknowledge that timetables are bad, like one to withdraw U.S. Troops from Iraq, will you admit the necessity to eliminate another timetable that claims the Earth is only 5000 years old?
If I admit that giving birth seems like the best choice, will you admit that it’s a choice?
If I admit that Liberals sometimes seek new change for the empty sake of change, will you admit that Conservatives, in the act of conserving our Republic, have over 200 years of practices, many bad, from which to choose their stances and still be considered good Conservatives, regardless?
If I admit that there is no definitive way to control the emotion of greed on Wall Street, will you admit that there is no definitive way to control the emotion of lust in our young adults?
If I admit that God exists, will you then admit that there’s no reason you have to tell me about him?
If I admit that I irrationally blame McCain’s party line, in part, for the mistakes of the George W. Bush administration, will you admit that Obama’s party line makes you irrationally fear another White House BJ?
If I admit that Democratic politicians don’t really care about poor Americans, will you admit that you don’t either?
If I admit that, in the interest of America, Saddam Hussein deserved to be forcibly removed from power and killed, will you admit that Osama Bin Laden deserved the same, first?
If I admit that the surge worked, will you admit that our soldiers deserve to come home then in triumph?
Posted by
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3:27 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election, Christian Nationalism, creationism, General Profundity, Intelligent Design, Iraq, Legislation, McCain, Obama, Palin, Religion, Rights
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
How to fix a natural disaster
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11:07 AM
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Labels: 2008 Election, disasters, Hurricanes, Ike, Terrorism
Thursday, September 4, 2008
I Don't See A Flag Pin
Posted by
Pockets
at
7:41 AM
4
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Labels: 2008 Election, Christian Nationalism, McCain, Palin, Patriots, Photoshop, You have got to be fucking kidding me
Wednesday, August 27, 2008
Wouldn't it be great if Al Qaeda blew up a major American city this week?
That would absolutely ruin the Democratic Convention, wouldn't it? I mean, I'm not wishing that anybody get hurt, but wouldn't the timing be incredible?
What
a
Bunch
of
ASSHOLES!
From Will Bunch of the Philadelphia Daily News (second link):
I hope for the sake of the beleaguered Gulf Coast that this doesn't come to pass -- but from a realpolitik point of view, there is a potential nightmare for the Republican Party swirling around the warm Caribbean waters right now.You are so right, Will. And I really hope a terrorist attack on Philadelphia doesn't come to pass -- but from a realpolitik point of view, that would absolutely kill the Democrats.
His name is Gustav.
The person who earns my "Jackass of the Year" award is Alex With an E at Daily Kos. He is one particularly giant, gaping, goatse of an asshole (third link):
Let me put it this way...Pissed off, yet? Then just wait, there's more from this cocksucker.
...I understand all about the "I hope this doesn't happen to New Orleans."
But, it's got to hit somewhere, and I hope it does hit New Orleans.
--------
And just like surgeons always cut a little more than they have to when removing a tumor, then yes, God, please, let a hurricane hit New Orleans. Let there be a moment of such absolute, perfect irony that the Republicans simply cannot, ever, live it down.
If it hits New Orleans -- and it doesn't have to be a Cat 5, I'm not sitting here working the worry beads hoping for total destruction [gee, thanks shithead - b] -- it puts the Republicans in the position of having to have a fucking party in the middle of a grotesque recreation of one of the country's worst natural disasters.Fuck you.
-------
I'm sorry people are upset about the notion of New Orleans, a city on the Gulf Coast being hit by a hurricane, but the Democratic Party has to stop being so Holier Than Thou. Progressive does not mean that someone can't be tough or ruthless. And the touchy-feely indignations are NOT going to win the election. A water-logged Waco will NOT be of any use in the election. And yes, this is a crucial election.
Fuck you.
Fuck you.
If anyone knows how to get a hold of Alex With an E, please direct him here and to Loki at Humid City. There are a lot of us who would like to have a word with him.
Personally, I'd rather beat him unconscious with a baseball bat. But that's just me.
Oh, and GernBlantzen: Fuck you, too.
props to Loki and Gutterboy
Posted by
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1:26 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election, disasters, Gustav, Hurricanes, idiots, Katrina, You have got to be fucking kidding me
Monday, July 28, 2008
Would you look at that...
Analysis: US now winning Iraq war that seemed lost
From the Associated Press:
Despite the occasional bursts of violence, Iraq has reached the point where the insurgents, who once controlled whole cities, no longer have the clout to threaten the viability of the central government.Of course, it should have been apparent that things were turning around when liquor stores in Baghdad stopped getting blown up.
---
Beyond that, there is something in the air in Iraq this summer.
In Baghdad, parks are filled every weekend with families playing and picnicking with their children. That was unthinkable only a year ago, when the first, barely visible signs of a turnaround emerged.
Now a moment has arrived for the Iraqis to try to take those positive threads and weave them into a lasting stability.
''I open my store at 10 a.m. and close it at 7 p.m.,'' Dawood said. ``The security situation is much better, and I hope it becomes even better because I believe that all Iraqis are brothers and deserve to live in peace.''Compare this to a story from 2005
Mr Sabah has little competition largely because Islamic extremists now register their disapproval of alcohol by bombing his rivals' premises. The Rose, however, is unscathed, presumably because the bombers fear the proximity of US military hardware.and another from just eight months ago
But even as Iraqis begin returning to liquor stores, they still take care to remain inconspicuous. On a recent day outside a liquor store on Saadoun Street, two men with a case of Johnnie Walker in their car were removing the bottles from the brightly labeled box and stashing them under the seats and in other hiding places.Regardless of the legitimacy of this war's beginnings, regardless of your opinion of Bush, things are getting better in Iraq. I guess the mainstream media is finally realizing they can't cover it up until November 9th.
---
A construction worker and Sadr City resident, who agreed to be interviewed on the condition he not be named, told of how he was beaten last year by the Mahdi Army, the militia loyal to Shiite cleric Muqtada Sadr, after his brother complained to militia members about his drinking.
Not that we're finished:
U.S. commanders say a substantial American military presence will be needed beyond 2009. But judging from the security gains that have been sustained over the first half of this year — as the Pentagon withdrew five Army brigades sent as reinforcements in 2007 — the remaining troops could be used as peacekeepers more than combatants.And it's still costing a shitload of money. What's the price for a stabilized democracy in an unstable region? How much is a military presence in the Middle East worth? More than we originally thought, but still less than the Democrats would have you believe.
Flame on, everybody. Don't disappoint me.
Posted by
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1:15 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election, Drinking, Iraq
Friday, July 18, 2008
Great, now I have to move to Kansas
Posted by
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2:13 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election
Monday, July 14, 2008
Obama, McCain to New Yorker:
"We're just as dumb as the rest of America"
Related: Poe's law escapes internet; "never going back"

Personally, I think that's pretty fucking funny.
Look at all the elements:
- burning flag
- Osama bin Laden
- Lunatic black-separatist
- Evil Muslim
- in the Oval Office
- standing on the Presidential Seal
However, in a scene that has become all too common in this country, we get this:
Obama: "tasteless and offensive"
McCain: "totally inappropriate"
What a pair of idiot pansies! Have we become so scared and stupid? Really, guys, I think you'll find your balls rolling around under the campaign bus seats. Maybe some staffer found them and put them in the overhead.
I saw on the news tonight (the NATIONAL news) some idiot saying, "Some people will take it seriously and may use it in political commercials." Yeah, we have words for those types of people: dumbass; imbecile; moron. If we didn't dumb down everything in our society in order to cater to the lowest common denominator, perhaps we wouldn't have to worry about all of those idiots thinking this is serious. I mean, come ON! The only people not offended by this are the fuckers who are being ridiculed. And that just adds to the FUCKING JOKE!
To quote Mugatu, "I feel like I'm taking crazy pills!"
From SFGate
But Art Spiegelman, the Pulitzer Prize-winning cartoonist and former New Yorker staffer, was baffled that much of the negative reaction to the cartoon was coming from Obama supporters on liberal blogs.What Art (Do you mind if I call you Art?) fails to realize is that the left-wing elite know that the rest of us are too stupid to get it. We need to have everything spoon-fed to us by the Nanny so we don't think too quickly and get our tummies all upset. Plus, as I've mentioned, people in Kansas don't read the New Yorker.
"They sound so elitist," Spiegelman told The Chronicle. "The essence of what they're saying is, 'I get it, but I don't trust the people in Kansas to get it.' But isn't that what the whole hope and change thing is supposed to be about? That they will get it."
McCain should have, to stay on message, said something akin to Little Green Footballs:
The cover is obviously a moonbat parody of what they think are right-wing ideas about their messiah. But they got so meta with it, they ended up wrapping around and making themselves look stupid.That's a perfect response. Just as much arrogant, snarky condescension as the cover, itself.
Obama should have said, "As bullet of mypantstheatre, a dear friend and, frankly, idol of mine, remarked, 'Personally, I think that's pretty fucking funny.'"
Or everyone could have, you know, ignored it. Like most of the country ignores every other issue of the New Yorker, which is, let's face it, a really boring magazine. Even when I was living in New York, I only read it because I felt like I had to. It never ceased to amuse me how important New Yorkers thought they were. Of course, I could hold that opinion because I wasn't one of the deluded East Coaster assholes who made living in NYC such a pain in the ass.
I'm going to have to stop. The irony levels are out of control! The ship canna take it any longer!
Is it November yet? I am so tired of this bullshit.
Posted by
bullet
at
11:52 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election, cartoons, idiots, You have got to be fucking kidding me
Thursday, March 13, 2008
My 2008 Primaries Gift to Senator John McCain
Not that the GOP smear machine has ever needed any help fabricating an issueless warpath to DNC shortcomings, but there is a blaringly obvious silver bullet in the news I’ve yet to see anyone capitalize upon. If I don’t talk about it I am going to burst and rarified Funk & Wagnalls colloquialisms are going to spill out over my hardwood floor. I hate mopping. So, Senator McCain, this is my gift to you.
As we forge ahead in veritable disgust that the outcome of an election might once again come down to a Florida court decision or its doppelganger chez Michigan, this time the decision as to who would indeed be the Democratic nominee, it is only natural to look back at 2000 and dream of sawing the whole peninsula off like Bugs Bunny. “South America, take it away!” My persistent migraine still swims with hanging chads, butterfly ballots, voter fraud, spoiled ballots, hot-ass Broward County, and a particularly disturbing image of Pat Buchanan looking accidentally sexy to voters. In that swarm of post-election answerlessness, the avalanche of particulars raised over weeks and over the year to follow was enough make me want to ride a Diebold machine over Niagara Falls…the Canadian side. Somehow, there were so many scraps of a demolished process to consider, no one sticks out in our minds as useful today. Or does one?
Am I the only one who remembers the embarrassment we were showing the world? How many times did they insert into the news broadcasts the opinions du jour from the common folk on the streets of Paris or expatriates working in the far Pacific rim? We were the laughing stock of the global political landscape. We knew it too. More than once the proceedings called for a more rapid decision making process, not only because the American people deserved it, but reportedly because we looked to the world like we had no idea what the hell we were doing. Him Big Chief Democracy, Broken Noggin. To this day I mildly suspect that Gore threw the extended fight so that his country might save face, and no other reason.
Well, for the Democratic Party, doesn’t a similar embarrassment apply now? Sure they were within their rights to punish state bodies when those states had broken party rules. Sure the candidates were reasonable to sign agreements regarding what would be zero seated delegates from those states. Now, barely a couple months later, months in which the race has proven too close to call, places like Florida and the campaigns themselves want to revisit the defunct primaries to hedge bets. It seems as if the Democratic Party doesn’t know how to run a primary in much the same way the U.S. seemed not to know how to count votes in an election. All party conventions should now hand out dunce caps.
All John McCain has to realize for an early and applicable snipe is that the Democrats as a group now look bad either way. If the candidates honor their signed agreements, as worthy as that might sound, they are in effect saying they hold with the idea of discounting people’s votes. If instead they keep with the belief that every vote should count, an ideal we hold dear, not only will they cost those states millions of dollars to rerun primaries, but they also look like hypocrites for going back on their signed, documented agreements. Hypocrite or anti-voter? Whom would you elect? Bracketed in this simple way, McCain could have his first one-two punch, still with additional room to portray Democrats as not knowing how to run their own primary. How can they run a country?
My personal solution to the disenfranchised Florida and Michigan Democratic Primaries lies in New Mexico. Remember when the 2000 election tally was still close and the media started running down the “what happens in the event of a tie” possibilities, state by state? Well, New Mexico’s contingency had something to do with five card stud, drawing straws, or a game of high card being the deciding factor. Seriously, that was the law. As history repeats itself, the news just yesterday ran the story about a game of stud poker in New Mexico that decided its elected Estancia Town Trustee. No wonder illegals want in!
Well, there’s our answer. The Florida and Michigan Democratic Primaries have to be declared ties. Surely each state has its own legislated tie-breaker, a legit’ one they should have already budgeted for or a silly one that involves something like monkeys ripping into cupcakes. Yes, we are not talking about tie votes, but there is more than one way to look at a tie. We could backwardly argue that zero delegates or zero outcome for each candidate in these states constitutes a tie. We could even go a more philosophical route and claim that despite the number of votes, New Mexico voters legally voted to play that hand of stud while despite the number of voters in Florida, Floridians essentially voted in hopes of effectuating some ridiculous tie-breaker when they were told votes wouldn’t count. In any case, I am positive that a documented election tie-breaker would save millions, eliminate fraud, and at least in that academically philosophical sense count votes toward an outcome.
Should the DNC take my advice, however, Senator John McCain is going to get a great soundbite. It’ll be speechifying akin to, “Do you want your President elected or decided by rock, paper scissors?”
Posted by
Pockets
at
12:02 AM
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Labels: 2008 Election, Florida, General Profundity, McCain, Michigan
Friday, February 15, 2008
Why my cat would make a good Presidential Candidate
**So as not to clog the chaplain's serious post with any more of my silliness, I've moved this bit of wishful thinking over here.

I am of the strong opinion that my cat, Jasper would make a much better Republican nominee for President than those we have to choose from this year.
- He is both black and white, thereby appealing to everyone (except yellow people, but a yellow cat having the capability to be president is so far-fetched as to be ridiculous; maybe Prime Minister or Attorney General)
- He is tough on crime, as evidenced by his program of catch and eat
- His immigration policy is extremely strict. No immigrants will be allowed without first being excessively sniffed and given the very difficult sit-on-the-lap-and-pet test.
- Like many conservatives he does not place a lot of importance on the sciences especially in the area of pill research, though experimentation in the treat field is still vigorously endorsed. Health care is also not a big priority.
Now before you say he is too conservative, he has other qualities that make him more of a moderate.
- He is very diplomatic and will not enter into a conflict until all other measures have been exhausted This usually takes about 30 - 45 seconds. This policy does not apply to mice, who, I think everyone would agree, are a menace and must be rooted out and destroyed. He showed proof of his great leadership as a general in the Great Basement Excavation Uprising of 2002.
- He believes in freedom of religion for all, being a Bastist, himself, and will even allow those without religion to worship him. Or even those with religion, he's very liberal in that respect.
His probable running mate would be his housemate Stella.
She brings some balance in being more tolerant of science and technology, though she is absolutely firm on the banning of compressed air and Roombas. She will relieve the apprehensions of the hawks in the party as she is very big on domestic espionage, pre-emptive strikes and, when absolutely warranted, "enhanced interrogation techniques." Big Business will also find a friend in Stella, especially the box, plastic bag and suitcase industries.
As a bonus, both candidates are DRM free!
If you think these are candidates you can get behind, I encourage you to join our massive write-in campaign and elect Jasper K. Purrface and Stella Bug Monkeybutt in 2008.
Posted by
bullet
at
5:23 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election, General Profundity
Tuesday, February 12, 2008
I am afraid
I had a lot planned for the coming days. I've been putting together a rant about Louisiana going for Huckabee and the ridiculous influence of Protestants in this once Catholic state. I had a whole bunch of research done on the constitutions of Afghanistan and Iraq and the questions, "Do a people who will choose democratically to subjugate their own rights and the rights of others deserve democracy? Who gets to decide this and what are the alternatives?" I had a nice thing going related to this about that poor bastard in Afghanistan who may be put to death (probably not) simply for questioning women's rights under Islam.
But none of that matters. I just had a revelation, if you will, while watching a Barack Obama commercial that ran Friday night (Yay Tivo!). I had an acting teacher who called this sort of thing "startling realization of the obvious," and he wasn't saying that disparagingly. But if it's so obvious, then why can't anyone else see it? That's one of the reasons I started writing things down to begin with. If these ideas are so clear, then why is no one smarter than me having them?
We are headed for a revolution in this country. Bear with me. I don't mean to say that lines and swords will be drawn, but you never know these days.
A line in the Obama commercial was about universal health care. I hate the idea of universal health care. Universal (national, socialized, whatever) health care will not work in this country. The only reason it works (sort of) in Canada is that they run a closed system. Doctors cannot not accept public money from patients in the system and private money from those without. You're in or you're out. Period. That won't fly here. People are used to their choices. They are used to being AMERICAN with all the privilege and entitlement that implies. A universal health care system, closed or otherwise, would only widen the disparity between the rich and the not rich. I don't say poor, because that's not who I'm talking about. The victims of universal health care, the victims of the carbon tax, the victims of the AMT, the victims of the war in Iraq, the victims of September 11, the victims of tax rebates and housing bailouts and every single program from the right and the left are the middle class.
The American Revolution was not started by the aristocracy but by farmers and shopkeepers. The French Revolution was not sparked by the starving poor but by the merchants being taxed into starvation. The Glorious Revolution was not started by the rural poor but by the urban professionals. The National Socialists rode to power on the backs of dissatisfied teachers, public servants and small business owners. In all of these cases, it was the middle class (or what passed for it at the time) that felt the worst pressure and helped drive these events. The poor were enraged cannon fodder, the self-important, jockeying upper class provided the money, but the middle class provided the thinking and the organization that toppled regimes and overturned social order.
The same paradigms exist today. The poor are always going to be poor and, quite honestly, they get better off every year. We have the richest poor people in history living in this country. The majority of them will always be poor and all the pandering and social programs in the world will not change that. The rich are always going to be rich. Barring catastrophe, the wealthy react to all change with adaptation that is only possible through means. They have to pay a little more? Whatever. They may gripe about it but, ultimately, they'll survive and continue to prosper. More taxes on the rich and more money being thrown at the poor will not change either's situation. It is the middle class that is caught in this crunch and is shrinking all the time. It is the middle class that will break.
All they need is a reason. All they need is a villain. They have that right now. Godlessness. The Christian middle class is being told every day that they are under fire, that they are being oppressed. The architects of their misfortunes and struggles are the atheists, the heathens, the heretics and the infidels. The Christians are fighting their war, their revolution, already. They fight it in the classroom, the courtroom, the council chamber and on the village green. Science is their enemy, rational thought is their oppressor, Satan is in everything secular and they are suffering because of it. The godless liberals and activist judges allow homosexuality and abortion to cripple them. The loss of Christian privilege will soon result in a new Coliseum, complete with lions. Every rumor is a roar and never quieted.
I used to say that when the revolution came it would come from the left, from those who would protect us from ourselves and regulate even our language and thoughts into total obedience and compliance. This is no longer the case. The revolution will come from the middle class; they will have God at their helm and all his righteous fury behind them.
We would not be in the situation in which we find ourselves if everything was ok. If they did not feel disenfranchised and marginalized, these people would not be turning to religion for answers. The fault of this lies where it usually does - in the ruling class and its greed and lust for power.
Right or left, conservative or liberal, Republican or Democrat, the labels don't matter anymore. The political parties exist now for a singular purpose - the accumulation of power and money. If the Democrats really cared about ending the war that's bankrupting the nation, they could in an instant. They are simply served better by a war going poorly than a defeat. If the war was going well, if the people still supported it, the entire Democratic party would be behind it, just as they were in the beginning. By the same token, if the illegals in this country could be counted on to vote Republican, they would have already been pardoned and naturalized. The Democrats use shame and the Republicans use fear. Both are used to further separate agendas with the same end. Power.
I am talking about parties, now, not people. The Clintons have already shown their lust for the big chair and aren't even trying to conceal it this time around. McCain wants to be liked. Huckabee thinks he can ride Chritianity to the Vice-Presidency, regardless of his actual belief in his Dominionist rhetoric. I cannot find an ulterior motive or insidious agenda in Obama, but I do believe that the Party will use him to further theirs. I also believe that what seems too good to be true usually is. As it turns out, even John Kennedy wasn't John Kennedy.
I have nothing to cite. No studies or data to back anything up. I only have my own observations and knowledge of history. Both, to be sure, are somewhat deficient. But I am, for the first time, afraid of what might happen in my lifetime. I don't think there will be organized and armed conflict or a sudden coup or anything that interesting, sensational or apocalyptic. At least, at first. I do see the possibility of the destruction of the Constitution and the failure of the American experiment. I see the possibility of "one Nation, under God."
My wife thinks I should speak out. Run for office. Try to effect change. I have no idea how to do any of that. I have no idea if my business, my marriage or my family would be able to withstand the strain of forever tilting at the windmills.
I am too old for idealism, yet I cannot stop believing. I have faith, yes, FAITH, in the Great Experiment. I have faith in the possibility of a New Enlightenment. I have faith in the American ideal, the Declaration, the Constitution, life, liberty and the pursuit.
But I'm afraid.
Posted by
bullet
at
11:09 PM
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Labels: 2008 Election


